Introduction

On a clear, moonlit night, January 23 2007, my children and I were playing with celery, peanut butter and raisins at the dinner table. Okay, it was just me playing. They were eating. With a flash of brilliance, I spread a dab of protein at the top of four stalks of celery and added two raisin eyes to make the weird creatures that inspired the tale of murder and mayhem you will read on this blog.

I started writing the story that night and for several nights afterwards, I sat at my computer almost constantly, working and reworking the plot. The story grew. I had originally planned to pen a short story. Soon it was a much longer piece of literature. That may be a bit generous, but this is my blog so I can say what I want.

I was so excited on February 17, 2007, when, my fingers flying over the keys, I typed out the thrilling climax of the tale. I intended to begin posting The Night of the Living Celery in short order.

Then tragedy struck!

As I was reviewing my final draft, I discovered a huge error. The tale was missing an entire day! I'd written about Sunday and Monday and...Wednesday. There was no Tuesday. I screamed in agony! I writhed on the floor foaming at the mouth. The story was not finished. There was more writing to be done.

I tried to add Tuesday in right away, but my creative juice press had run dry. I couldn't think of events to fill the missing 24 hours. I left The Night on my computer and walked away. For months I didn't write anything. I thought about the story from time to time, but every time I thought about sitting down to work on the piece, I found something else to do. My heart wasn't in it any more.

Finally, during a visit with family in Delaware in December 2009, I took up the mighty "pen" again. I "scribbled" furiously until the missing day was found. It had been hiding in the crevasses of my brain all that time. It just needed some time to perculate. I pounded out the chapters that filled in the time gap. It took just a few days.

Then the story sat again. I wanted to edit the new final draft, but I couldn't find the time. I thought about it often, but never stopped what I was doing to do the painful work. Weeks passed, then months. Would Living Celery ever see the light of day? It seemed unlikely.

Then suddenly it was done. I felt like editting one day. I sat down and did it. It was finished. I had my wife read through the final draft to double check everything. She gave it a thumbs up.

It's July 16, 2010 - more than three and a half years after the moonlit night that started it all - and my story is finally ready to go live. On August 1, 2010, I will begin posting The Night of the Living Celery one chapter at a time on this blog. Each day more of the story will be revealed. Each day you will revisit this blog to find out what happens next. You must read more! Are you brainwashed yet?

I hope The Night of the Living Celery makes you laugh and, at least a little, keeps you on the edge of your seat. Enjoy!